LOAFTING!
that one word discribes the entirity of this semester. Lack there of of structure and work to be done has rendered me into an ADHD state of mind. I can't seem to sit still and just get my work done. If i had the will power to really get down to work. and really do it properly, oh my i'd be getting something lik 100% in every class. Yes that's including math, considering, well up until now it hasn't been hard.
But no, my head is elsewhere. It's off wondering where that boy is. It's off wondering how i'm to get a job. It's off in its own world.

I can barley pull myself together.

I guess i'm just trying to get the best out of the last semester of freedom. Seeing as next year + loafting = spending the rest of my life in my parents basement and community college.
It does kinda suck that we pretty much decide our entire future before we turn into legal adults, like who's the smart ass that cam eup with this concept. Go ahead decide your future, no you can't vote, you can't drink or buy cigarettes, not even a lottery ticket, you're not allowed in bars or clubs and basically know nothing about the real world, but you are expected to make the biggest dicision of your life. Good luck .

I've seen the average man in tears, breaking down in front of his peers, asking himself what should i do?

I've successfully convinced my parents that i need a job. I think the only reason they agreed is because i have become such a terrible loaft. In their eyes, i'm wasting this semester. In truth, that's exactly what im doing. I come home and sleep. Everyday. That's what i do. I come home, loaft for 2 hours and then nap for 3. Upon waking i attempt some homework, fail and go for a run. Then i shower and attempt homework again till 1 am. Don't get enough sleep and am tired the rest of the next day just waiting to get home and nap. It's ridiculous i know. and im just screwing myself over. But i can't seem to find a balance.

Even if it's your fault, don't worry much, just move on.

Onward id just like to add, i hate it when you're ugly and look crappy and the day sucks and then people come over. And not just any people, but really judgemental company. They're annoying and you can tell by the way they look at you that you seem like trash to them. Well too bad. It's sunday and its a day too feel and look crappy, sucks for you that you had to come over on a day liek today.

You gotta love her style and class and the way she words herself, you gotta love a girl who can, who can just get up and go.

Damn i don't know what i would do if i didn't have the friends i do. They're friggin great and i don't say this often enough but they truley are. I mean the fact that they listen to me rant on and on about the same thing or about the same certain someone, even if they probably think i'm stupid for even thinking like that. They're always there no matter what. You guys make my life. So thankss. :)

I hope it's not too late for you, you see here i've got nothing better to do, then drive away.

And lastly, i'd just liek to say i've been obsessed with RightClickandSave. He's friggin great. His songs have been and still are on repeat all weekend long. Everything in Italics in this post is a line from one of his songs. Including the title :)

And i got the note you left on the table, it read i love you too, i love those cute things you do. i love everything about you.


Love always, 
Haya. 

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